Spirit Wars

sunset in Llano Quemado

Wednesday evening sunset

Thoughts from the past pull me down. Can’t look at this stuff. I’m older now, with more awareness. Sure, I’d do things differently in an impossible world. The horror is misplaced, in other words. I imagine something that never could have been. There is no crime! Women are better at this, I think. More present.

“You chose this,” she says, but without rancor, like noting the year the big holly tree broke its roots and fell against the house. “You can do absolutely anything you want.”

I can’t believe I’m not in jail. The bars are so familiar. The cot, the toilet, the way the room smells. Everything a-jumble on the frontier, living in the cabin of the plane we crashed in. Thinking of the big black dog.

Down by the River

path along the Rio Grande

Path through salt cedars and willows

Down by the river
and there’s just me
making my way while
the way makes me

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Shotgun in a Shoe Box

Old Town, Albuquerque, NM

A week ago in Albuquerque

This is the sort of tale you need your Jesus-in-a-box for. The weird thing is, I only connected the two events below the other day, and this was decades later.

I was a junior at Massapequa High School on Long Island. For this Air Force brat from Texas, going from dust storms and football to New York in any form was quite a shock. Everyone in Abilene was named Jim Bob or Betty Sue. There was a single Jewish family in town who owned a shoe store. At Massapequa High, the student body was one third Italian, one third Jewish, the other third Irish and assorted, and they were always getting into fights. Not a black face in the bunch, you may be sure.

One of the first things I learned about was the murder in the shower room in the boys’ gym. This would have been a couple of years before I showed up. As I recall, one kid had blown away another with a shotgun. That’s the only detail I remember. This was years ago, you realize, when such behavior was unheard of.

Massapequa must have been ahead of its time. There were junior high school girls shooting up heroin on the school bus—Time or Newsweek had an article about it once—all this in a heavily-developed, upscale place. It probably wasn’t just like I remember, but the high school did offer four years of German, French, Italian, Spanish, Russian, and Chinese, and that was almost as interesting as my girlfriend.

[continue reading…]

I Got This

your humble author

Watch out!

There’s a new thing I’m trying out at Medium. It’s kind of hard to explain what Medium is, but I really like the formatting, and because of the way the site is configured, it’s possible to attract a lot of attention if you’re good. In fact, the opportunity may exist to greatly expand the number of people who see my work. The folks who set it up originally started Blogger and then sold it to Google for a bazillion dollars, so maybe they don’t have their heads up their asses. One can hope.

What I’ve done so far is to select a few essays from this blog for republishing at Medium. Above is the top part of what my profile page looks like for the moment. That’s my Twitter “bio” just below. Farther down where you can’t see is a list of what I’ve posted, all pieces from JHFARR.COM so far, but that will change. They have a very slick Web interface for composing that’s fun to use—especially with photos—and I’m playing around with it to stir up some dust.

Cranes Up Close

sandhill cranes up close

Gotta love those golden eyes

Another shot from Bernardo Wildlife Area. This one is barely cropped at all, so you can tell we were close. Dang critters were walking across the road in front of the car! If you want to see sandhill cranes, this is the place.

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